Well this year was one of the toughest years for me financially. As a freelancer and a home owner I was incredibly lucky to have had enough work to pay the mortgage and my bills and still feed myself.This was the first time in six years that I didn't have a long project to more onto. I survived on small gigs, a little waitressing, selling stuff off on gumtree, getting in a Flatmate and generally culling my spending. It also gave me time to work on a number of different projects of my own. I went to my first industry conference, festival and have taken a side step into a smaller role on a bigger project. I have done 2 radio interviews and spoken to a classroom of up and coming film makers. I turned 40!!
I have struggled but I am happy with what I have achieved this year - met lots of new people on different projects - unfortunately freebie, low budget and deferral projects. A project I did a few years ago was released this year. I got paid to direct a few episodes of a series.
I am still single and childless and the best auntie ever!! Relationships continue to baffle me. And now I have new 'dangerous' ideas in my head thanks to dan savage. It's all about expectations, and what most people expect from their partners is quite unreasonable and they don't want to talk about it. Heterosexual relationships - men and women spend years searching for that one person who will be their everything. Once they find someone close enough that they can tolerate (we'll call this 'love') and settle down they spend the rest of the time trying to get away from each other on boys nights, ladies lunches etc. Where I am friends with men and they get married - I am somehow expected to hang with the girls even though I hardly know them. Purely based on my gender am I supposed to want to hang with women more than men? It doesn't make sense - and you know it.
I also discovered that as a single woman , if I ever comment on a member of the opposite sex, then I am told "ooh, you have a crush on him!" Or "you are so in love with him". I had one friend, after telling her that i met someone she studied with and we got on immediately ask, " did you sleep with him?" Well no, I didn't know that's what I was expected to do when meeting people that know you. It is kinda odd when you think about it. I don't get the same questions if I say the same about a woman I met, and I wouldn't get them if I wasn't single either. This is pretty much why I keep my private life private (except for this blog).
I had a rather stressful December at work and it continues on into January, which I am actually grateful for. Christmas was the usual gastronomic family affair. Lots of fun. I also gathered some fellow freelancers for a little Christmas drink at Pocket bar. I figured as freelancers we don't always get Christmas parties, so let's have one of our own. It was a pretty quiet affair but lovely to catch up with those that came. Most of it finished up pretty early but all I needed was one person to say "one more?", and I don't know what time I got home, but I slept late and was a little hung over the next day - must have been a good one.
And now I have escaped north (to an undisclosed location, except that I tagged myself in on FB the other night) to hang with a good friend and just chill. Happy to be out of Sydney and the pressure everyone puts on New Year's Eve. It's great, I have forgotten what day it is and don't care what time it is and my brain is so relaxed that I am asking really dumb questions - now that's love!!
Happy new year folks and catch you on the flip side that is 2014!!!
